27. December 2012 · Comments Off on How To Tongue Kiss-Learning How To Tongue Kiss Is Really As Easy As 1-2-3 · Categories: Relationships · Tags: , ,

It is believed that France was the first country to discover the wonderful art of kissing and how to tongue kiss. Although the French are famous for inventing the French kiss, initially it was called the soul kiss because such a kiss is believed to come from the heart and of course the soul.

There are no hard and fast rules when it comes to tongue kissing but there are some tongue kissing tips and techniques that will make the journey extremely pleasurable for you as you become an expert at how to tongue kiss.

Let me say that if you enjoy it whole heartedly and kiss with a lot of passion and a lot of heart most of the hard work is done for you. All that’s left is learning a few French kissing or tongue kissing tips that will have your love interest absolutely melt in your arms.

Here are some French kissing tips and techniques to help you learn how to tongue kiss starting today.

The Secret To A Delicious Long And Slow Tongue Kiss

When I think of the perfect movie tongue kiss I think of the way that Tom Cruise so sweetly devoured Kelly McGillis in the movie “Top Gun” with Take My Breath Away playing in the background. No matter how old I am, that tongue kiss has the same impact on me every single time. I feel like a teenager again every time I see that tongue kiss.

But the fact is that real life is very different. You don’t know if they want to tongue kiss you, you don’t know how to tongue kiss, they are really shy, he has been giving you mixed signals, you are not sure if she wants you to be just a friend.

The mere thought of tongue kissing a guy or tongue kissing a girl could have you feeling like you have just been through a train wreck. If you have never tongue kissed before you know you get just one chance. Blow it and they may never think of you romantically again!

I once met this totally cute guy at a night club. This guy was hot. He was the best looking guy in the place, but when he tongue kissed me he was a total dud. It was the worst tongue kiss I had ever had with anyone and I’ve had quite a few.

No matter how great looking he was, I felt nothing when I tongue kissed him and never wanted to see him again. That may sound terrible but that was my first tongue kissing impression of him and it wasn’t good.

What did he do wrong? His whole tongue kissing technique was terrible. The man had been married before, to a French woman too. Maybe when they were giving out French kissing lessons she was away from school. His French kissing style – well, there was none. To me it felt like I was kissing someone who had never been tongue kissed before and I then and there decided never to see him again.

French kissing had always come so naturally to me but all of a sudden I realized that some people are natural born kissers and others just need a little guidance and practice.

Here are a few tongue kissing tips and tongue kissing techniques to help you on your way.

The Start Of A Tongue Kiss

When your two lips meet keep them slightly parted (no tongue kissing) and press very gently against the other person’s lips. Make sure you don’t bump noses (but if you do just laugh) by tilting your head slightly to one side.

The Beginning Of A Tongue Kiss

French kisses, tongue kisses, tongue pashes, whatever you want to call them, involve the use of your tongue. Kissing is a lot like dancing. Your lips and tongues move with one another at the same pace in the same style. Just like dancing, you are following one another’s lead.

Once you have started kissing one of you will slip your tongue into the other person’s mouth. Whatever you do, don’t make your tongue disappear back into your mouth like a startled turtle; and don’t let your tongue just sit there either. Move it around their tongue, gently suck on their tongue, chase one another’s tongues around their mouths.

Keep tongue kissing this way till either of you have had enough or you want to try a different type of kissing.

How to End A Tongue Kiss

To end a kiss finish it off the way it started; slow down the movement of your tongue, ever, ever so slowly move your heads apart, if you like press your lips against theirs one more time, look into their yes and smile.

Voila. You are now on your way to perfecting the perfect tongue kiss and mastering the art of kissing.

I know it sounds easy on paper and some more guidance and even photos would be helpful in perfecting the ultimate mind blowing tongue kiss.

25. December 2012 · Comments Off on Learn How To Kiss Good: Anyone Can Learn How To Kiss Good Starting Today · Categories: Relationships · Tags: , ,

There are no hard and fast rules when it comes to learning how to kiss good. Let me say at the start if you enjoy kissing whole heartedly with a lot of passion and feeling most of the hard work is done for you. All that’s left is learning a few kissing tips or kissing techniques that will have your love interest thinking you’re the best kisser they’ve ever had.

Some people find kissing is the easy part. Making your move is the nerve-wracking part. You probably remember watching Happy Days and seeing all the moves those guys used to make to lock lips with girls.

The fundamentals of learning how to kiss good are experimentation, imagination, kindness, preparation, respect, communication, and very importantly confidence. Build your confidence by thinking that kissing is the natural way that you express how you feel about your love interest. There is no confidence booster like having knowledge. When you truly feel in yourself that you do know how to not only kiss good but sizzle at it, your confidence will carry forward with your kissing.

It’s also absolutely critical before you even think about kissing anyone that you do not have bad breath, you don’t have a rough beard, you don’t have body odour and that you’re not about to pounce on her like an octopus.

Here is the classic kissing move. A great place to try this one out is at the movies or whenever the moment is right and you are sitting next to one another.

Put your arm around her shoulder. Watch her body language and see how she reacts to his.

If she snuggles into you or rests her shoulder on you just enjoy the moment for a few minutes. Next thing to do is put your fingers under her chin with your free hand that is not around her and gently tilt her head up so she is looking at you.

In order to learn how to kiss good you need to practice. If you have never kissed anyone before or have had little practice you know you get just one chance. Blow it and they may never think of you romantically again! That’s why it’s absolutely critical that you learn how to kiss good as soon as possible, to avoid any embarrassment and humiliation.

Anyone can become a great kisser, provided they follow the right kissing techniques, tips and kissing advice from people who are qualified to give it.

In order to kiss good you need to be aware of how your love interest is feeling about you and your kiss. When your two lips meet keep them slightly parted and press very gently against the other person’s lips. Make sure you don’t bump noses (but if you do just laugh) by tilting your head slightly to one side.

Kissing is a lot like dancing. Your lips and tongues move with one another at the same pace in the same style. Just like dancing, you are following one another’s lead. You should be aware of how comfortable the girl feels with your kiss.

Once you have start to kiss one of you will slip your tongue into the other person’s mouth. Whatever you do, don’t make your tongue disappear back into your mouth like a startled turtle; and don’t let your tongue just sit there either. Move it around their tongue, gently suck on their tongue, chase one another’s tongues around their mouths. This is what will make the difference between knowing that you kiss good and being a shocking kisser.

It’s important when you start to learn how to kiss good that you identify all the embarrassing things to avoid! Don’t let your next kiss become an experience that haunts you forever. Make it your goal to follow all the kissing advice you need so that you can avoid the pitfalls and slip-ups that can jeopardize your chances of dating the girl of your dreams and becoming the best kisser she’s ever had. I guarantee if you follow the right kissing advice you will learn not only how to kiss good but how to be a truly memorable kisser that they will remember forever.

30. November 2012 · Comments Off on Divorce Parties – Tasteless Or Therapeutic? · Categories: Relationships · Tags: , ,

It used to be that when a friend was getting divorced that you were ready to provide her with a shoulder to cry on. These days you may find that you need to be ready to help her plan a divorce party. I had always thought of divorce parties as something that only the bitterest of women would consider, but when I found out that there are companies providing divorce party products and authors publishing divorce party guides I knew I needed to learn more.

After I wrote a series of articles about divorce parties, women began writing to me and sharing their divorce party stories and even a few videos from their divorce parties. I quickly discovered that just as divorces can be amicable, ugly, or somewhere in between, divorce parties also fall into similar categories. Here are the typical scenarios of the divorce party stories that were shared with me.

The Hooray It’s Over Party- The wildest divorce party stories and videos that I received fell into this category. These parties were a true celebration of the marriage being over and the divorce being final. I received videos of wedding dresses being set ablaze and women cutting phallus shaped cakes into very tiny pieces. It’s no great surprise that these parties stemmed from ugly divorces.

At first glance I thought that this type of divorce party was very offensive because it seemed to center so much around celebrating the divorce. After reading stories about divorces where ex husbands fought to get the wedding china only to send it back to their ex wives smashed into mere fragments, I could understand these women feeling gleeful as they stuffed marriage licenses down the drain and turned on the garbage disposal. The women who did throw these parties still had a lot of anger about their divorce, and several expressed that being able to have a night of ranting about their ex was cathartic. If that’s what it takes to get rid of your anger, then I do think that it’s healthier than just hanging onto your rage without any outlet for it.

The Sisterhood Party- By far these were the most common types of divorce parties that women told me about. The focus of these parties was to let the newly divorced woman know that she is not alone. There was still the occasional destruction of the marriage certificate or burial of the wedding ring, but these seemed to be gestures of providing closure with a focus on moving forward rather than being angry.

It’s important for women to know that they have a support system after their lives have changed so drastically. The activities at these parties were more mild, and they seemed to involve things like watching chick flicks or party games that focused on all the things that the newly divorced woman could do now that her ex was out of the picture. At first I thought that was being awfully critical of their married life, but when I received stories from women who were worried about spending every other weekend without their kids, I began to appreciate how much these women needed a few bright spots to look forward to so that this part of their lives could be a new beginning rather than just the end of huge part of their lives.

The Solidarity Party- Unfortunately, these were the least common party types that women shared with me. I’m sure that this is because a truly amicable divorce, especially when the divorce is recent, is very rare. In these parties, the ex-husband and some of his family and friends attended. The purpose here was to show everyone that they were going to remain on friendly terms and that friends and family didn’t need to choose whether they were going to ally themselves with him or with her.

All of these parties were thrown by couples who had children, and for many this was the driving force behind wanting to have this show of solidarity. They wanted the kids to feel that their relationship with their parents would remain the same even though mom and dad were no longer living together. One couple even wrote “divorce vows” where they promised that they would not speak badly about their ex or make major parenting decisions without consulting their ex. The hopeless romantic in me couldn’t help but think that if they could be so amicable maybe they had a shot at remaining married, but I did admire how they focused on making the divorce as smooth as possible for their children.

After having so much information about divorce parties shared with me, I no longer wrinkle my nose when I hear that a woman is having a divorce party. I can’t help but prefer to hear about ones that are amicable or supportive, but I no longer think any less of the women that feel the need to throw a divorce party that is an out and out celebration. As long as women find these parties helpful for moving forward after divorce I can’t fault them for the type of party the their particular type of divorce has inspired them to throw.
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27. November 2012 · Comments Off on Six Perfect Redneck Date Movies · Categories: Relationships · Tags: , ,

Let’s make one thing perfectly clear, right off: redneck date movies, for the most part, are NOT being made today. Your average chick flick is something like Sex and the City – okay for most redneck women, but not what you’d call appealing to the redneck in her.

This gives a distinct advantage to the redneck man: the only absolutely great movies are only out on DVD. This means she has to go to your home to see them – or you need to go to hers. Need I say more on this?

Out of respect for men, there will be no Thelma and Louise in this list, and the movies listed will all include at least something that appeals to the men.

1. Gone With the Wind: This should be the centerpiece of your redneck date-movie library, if you can stand the length. this film is full of romance and drama and comedy and action – it’s the original Hollywood blockbuster, with something for everyone. Because it’s about a three-hour movie, plan a whole evening around it. Have dinner while watching it for the first half, then during the intermission move your dinner stuff out and replace it with your beverage of choice while relaxing on the couch.

2. Steel Magnolias: Okay, this one’s a little chick-flicky, but it’s a guaranteed winner for her, and if you don’t do anything stupid it should even guarantee you a second date. Steel Magnolias is about strong Southern women supporting each other, and though there are no car chases or action scenes more powerful than Dolly Parton’s hair being teased, you will probably enjoy it.

3. Anything by the Duke: You’re going to love these, and with John Wayne, the archetypical strong man, she should just melt. If you’d like a great love story, try The Quiet Man; for something a little more intensely masculine, try Rooster Cogburn. If she’s a military lover – and a lot of redneck women boast loved ones in the military these days – go for some of his war films.

4. Most pre-1960 romantic film classics: Start with Casablanca, and move through all the Fred Astaire/Ginger Rogers films. If it includes Marilyn Monroe, Cary Grant, or Errol Flynn, grab it. These are movies most people don’t think of as redneck films – but they are films that promote the ethics Hollywood has lost. A fringe benefit: if you bring her to your house and you have a shelf of these films, she’ll be impressed with your sensitive side. You will not need to do anything additional.

5. Eve’s Bayou is nicely creepy, a psychological thriller set in the hot sultry damp of a Louisiana swamp. If you’re looking for something a little different that you can both discuss later, this is the one.

6. Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood may overwhelm your testosterone, but it’s a really great movie for making her laugh. Only pick this one up if you’re able to stick out two hours of female empowerment and mushy romantic stuff. It is a fantastic movie, though, and will impress her with your understanding of women.

Not all these are for every redneck man or woman. You will discover when you begin to go through them, that even many of the female oriented ones will catch your eye. And if you show one of these on your first date, you can go with the ye-haa car chase movie on the second one.

20. November 2012 · Comments Off on Top 10 Wedding Cake Cutting Songs & Ideas · Categories: Relationships · Tags: , ,

Your wedding reception is almost over, and the fun and lightheartedness of the day has finally kicked in – it’s time for the cake! One of the least stressful moments of your wedding has begun and to celebrate it, cut your cake with a light, fun song! Traditionally, many brides have used “The Bride Cuts the Cake” (to the tune of The Farmer in the Dell), but many modern brides are selecting more contemporary cake cutting songs.

Whether you choose something traditional such as “Happy Together” by the Turtles or something a bit edgier with a rock sound such as “Pour Some Sugar on Me” by Def Leppard, the song you select for your cake cutting ceremony should be reflective of both of your personalities. This is the one moment of your wedding where you do not have to be very traditional, you can be as funky and different as you want to be. When you are cutting the cake you certainly want people to remember the moment for as long as you will and playing the right music will definitely help to make that happen.

Since most songs are several minutes in length, the cake cutting ceremony may be shorter than the song itself. You will want to consult with your band or DJ and let them know exactly how to play the song. Most songs can be cut in length or have only a chorus or two played.

If you are stuck for ideas for songs for your cake cutting ceremony, here is a Top 10 List of Cake Cutting music compiled by DJ Robert Fayder, Owner of Party Perfect NYC.

Wanna Grow Old With You – Adam SandlerWhen I’m 64 – The BeatlesIce Cream – Sarah McGlocklainSugar Sugar – The ArchiesLove and Marriage – Frank SinatraBuild Me Up Buttercup – The FoundationsGoing To The Chapel – The ShirellsHow Sweet It Is – James TaylorHow Deep Is Your Love – Bee GeesYou Make Me So Very Happy – Blood Sweat and Tears
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05. August 2012 · Comments Off on Do Aphrodisiacs Really Work · Categories: Relationships · Tags: , ,

The effectiveness of aphrodisiacs has sparked a lot of debates in the past few decades. Research regarding its benefits are ongoing even though no scientist has come out and made a claim for any one of them. There are some scientists who believe that so called aphrodisiacs act as mere placebos. The problem is that sexual arousal is a very complex subject and the conditions that bring it about are difficult to isolate.

The name aphrodisiac originated from the Greek goddess Aphrodite. Throughout recorded history, a belief in their various forms has been present. For instance, the Chinese treat them very seriously indeed. The genitalia of male animals are thought to promote masculine virility in Chinese culture. Unfortunately, this leads to the buying of genitalia from seals and tigers which endangers their survival.

The belief in aphrodisiacs has also made victims of other animals. The rhinoceros is hunted for their horn, which is ground into a powder. Unfortunately, the desire for this animal’s horn is contributing to the endangered status of the species. Turtle eggs are also sought after and so they are often poached and dissected for their eggs. Apart from being considered as aphrodisiacs, they are also a delicacy, and are eaten raw, flavored with lime juice and salt.

Oysters are probably the most famous of the many different aphrodisiacs. The multi million dollar oyster industry often promote its product as the vital ingredient of any romantic, candle lit dinner for two. However, there are no conclusive research to support that it works.

There is also a wide spread belief that women have a weakness for chocolate. People believe that there is a chemical in chocolate that causes sexual arousal and increase in sex drive. The problem is that you would need to eat a great deal of it for it to kick in. At least, it isn’t doing any harm because chocolate isn’t an endangered species.

The arguments regarding this subject will surely continue for many more years to come. The brain is a very susceptible organ that responds to many different stimuli. A response may be triggered by the mere suggestion or reputation of something being an aphrodisiac. The truth may fall somewhere in the middle of the skeptics and the true believers. The culture of aphrodisiacs is surely here to stay whatever its scientific value.

01. May 2012 · Comments Off on The Importance of Women’s Friendships · Categories: Relationships · Tags: , ,

The special bond found in female friendships has proven to have tremendous benefits, psychologically, physically, and spiritually. Now is the perfect time to reinforce and celebrate those relationships. Sunday, September 19th is the 10th National Women’s Friendship Day. This celebration has been endorsed by the governors of thirty-four states, and has become so popular that now the entire month of September has been declared the National Women’s Friendship Month!

Why are women’s friendships so important that they warrant national recognition? In recent years, research has shown that friendships between women have a wide range of health benefits that have widespread socio-economic repercussions. Through their friendships women build nurturing, emotionally-fulfilling bonds that serve as highly effective support systems. Within these relationships, women gain self esteem and validation. They find support in times of trouble and safe avenues for expressing their feelings and thoughts. A circle of women creates a sacred space that allows each to be more deeply present and proactive in their lives. In general, women with close female friends experience greater happiness and fulfillment.

These emotional benefits have direct physiological effects. A landmark UCLA study found that in times of stress, when men normally respond with a “fight or flight” reflex, women have an additional choice in their behavioral repertoire, to “tend and befriend.” They pull together to support and nurture one another. This behavior releases extra oxytocin, a chemical that counters stress and produces a calming effect. Women connecting with women can actually assist in lowering blood pressure, heart rate, and cholesterol. A Harvard Medical School Nurse’s Health Study further shows that because stress also wreaks havoc on blood glucose levels, healing, bone density and the aging process, women’s friendships can help counteract all these detrimental effects of stress as well. Conversely, researchers also concluded that NOT having close friends is as detrimental to your health as smoking or carrying extra weight.

Other studies suggest that an older woman’s risk of dying from heart disease may be linked to the number of family and social relationships she has. In one study among 503 women with symptoms of coronary artery disease, those with few personal contacts were more than twice as likely to die over the next two to four years as women with more social ties. When the researchers also looked at how women coped with widowhood, they found that those who had a close confidante were more likely to survive the experience without suffering new and lasting physical ailments or permanent loss of vitality. Finally, science is confirming what we knew all along! Our girlfriends are essential to our well being, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. So, take the time during this National Women’s Friendship Month to acknowledge and enhance all your wonderful friendships. There are all sorts of ways to celebrate. You can reconnect with a friend over lunch or plan a girl’s night out or even a weekend getaway. You can take part in a women’s health fair, or a seminar on an issue important to women, or organize a clothing drive for needy women. You can expand your circle of women friends by going on a women’s retreat or join a women’s group like The Transitions Network which is a national organization for women over fifty. Look in you local papers to see what special activities are going on to commemorate this month. Commit to doing something to strengthen these important relationships. Embrace your sisterhood!

Copyright (c) 2009 Karin Marcus

02. April 2012 · Comments Off on What You Can Learn From President Obama’s Mother-in-Law · Categories: Relationships · Tags: , ,

Now that Michelle Obama’s mother is living in the White House, will the cruel jokes and snide remarks about mothers-in-law finally stop? Will Marian Robinson, as first mother-in-law, be able to pave the way for acceptance, even respect, for this much-maligned branch of the family tree? Only time, and the nightly comedians, will tell.

If you have a new son-in-law yourself, you can use Mrs. Robinson and other successful in-laws as your guides. Let them teach you how to adjust to your new role. It’s not easy. Once you’ve made the final payment for your daughter’s dream wedding, you may find yourself relegated to the back burner.

Instead of you, your daughter’s new husband is now the one who shares her confidences. After spending the past couple of decades as an active and involved mom, do you now feel like a Lame Duck? Even more important, how can you learn to relate to the guy who is now the center of your daughter’s universe? Here are a few tips to get you started with your own son-in-law:

1. Move slowly into the role of mother-in-law, remembering that your daughter’s spouse arrives with his own issues, unique temperament and family rituals. Learn more about him and his family rather than expecting him to blend into yours. Remember that family loyalty goes both ways.

2. Imagine the situation from your son-in-law’s perspective. Recognize that he wants to build and strengthen his new family unit. Doris is trying to let go of her need to continue such a tight relationship with her daughter. “I know she is bonding with her husband, so I don’t snoop or ask too many questions. As an only child I don’t like to go halves with anything, so it’s hard for me to share my precious daughter. But I know that her husband has to be the focus for her now.”

3. Respect your daughter’s choice and learn to love her life partner. By focusing on how happy your daughter is and on your son-in-law’s positive qualities, you’ll be building on the mutual good feelings. This can serve as an emotional savings account you can draw on later when other situations lead to tension between you.

4. Hold back on your opinions, advice and constructive criticism, at least until there is more trust in the relationship. This can be a challenge, as Nancy found: “I’m very careful about what I say, so I don’t think my son-in-law knows that I’m holding back. We get along fine on the surface but I hope that some day we can deal with deeper issues.”

5. Avoid hot button issues like finances, religious observances, and work/home responsibilities. By taking sides, you make it harder for the newlyweds to sort out these issues for themselves. When you have expectations that are not shared by them, recognize that now it’s their turn to make this type of decision.

6. Be available to help when asked but don’t intrude. As the new couple settles into their routine and lifestyle, they may ask for your help or support. Pitch in and be responsive to their needs when you can, but don’t overstep the boundaries.

7. Find support from your spouse and friends. When you’re frustrated, share with others who will understand what you’re going through and use them as a sounding board. When all else fails, laugh together as inductees in the sisterhood of mothers-in-law.

These tips can help you build the kind of relationship with your son-in-law that Marian Robinson has with President Obama. He and Michelle respect her and trust her to help with their children. Embrace your new role of mother-in-law. You, too, have the power to make this an enriching chapter for everyone in the family.

© 2009, HerMentorCenter.com

28. March 2012 · Comments Off on Places You Can Visit While Dating in Connecticut · Categories: Relationships · Tags: , ,

Connecticut is a state in the United States. It has a humid continental climate and a humid subtropical climate. Winters in this state are very cold while the springs have a variable climate. The summers are hot and humid and thunderstorms are quite common during this season. If you are dating in Connecticut you will want to go out with your partner to have fun. You will want to go see some beautiful places, go drinking in a local pub or eat some good food in a nice restaurant. Going out together will help you become close to each other.

While dating in Connecticut, you can go to Connecticut Beardsley Zoo in Bridgeport. This place has animals from the north and south America. You will also see the deer if you take a walk along the hoofstock trail. This zoo has a place you can eat from if you get hungry which is known as the Peacock Cafe. Stamford Museum & Nature Center is another place you can go to in Connecticut. This place is in Stamford. This museum has a place where you and your partner can picnic or go and take a hike. Sometimes it holds activities like wine tasting. You will have fun tasting the wine with your date and trying to determine its year. It is a wonderful experience. If you love the birds and you think they are beautiful you can go and see them in Connecticut Audubon Society Birdcraft museum which is found in Fairfield. It has about one hundred and twenty birds species to see.

You can also go check out the Dinosaur State Park while dating in Connecticut. This place has life size dioramas and an arboretum filled with dinosaur era plants. Go see for your self what the dinosaurs used to feed on. You can also go for a picnic in this very park and also see their nature trails. While in Connecticut you should check out the Bruce Museum in Greenwich. It has good decorative arts. It also has an environmental gallery that you should check out. Another park in this state that you can visit is the South Falls State Park which is found in Oxford. It has a great waterfall and a good covered bridge.

You can also go to the Maritime Aquarium while dating in Connecticut. In this aquarium you will have a chance to see sharks in a very close range and also have an opportunity to see the seals and sea turtles. You will be able to see the many marine animals that you do not see in your daily life. It is a good experience especially to get to see the sharks up close and knowing that they can not harm you. The Submarine Force museum is also another place you can go to while in Connecticut. This museum is home for the first nuclear powered submarine. If you love the theater and you love live performance then the best place to go is the Fairfield Theater company. This place has a lot of live stage entertainment. Though it was opened quite recently, it has already had many shows taking place.

21. December 2011 · Comments Off on Sex Tips, Ideas, Guidelines and Suggestions – Starting With E and F · Categories: Relationships · Tags: , ,

We modestly offer sex advice consisting of short alphabetical pieces. We aim to improve your sex life. Each article includes at least two positive and two negative suggestions, based on words that you never thought were sexy. Review these proposals and schemes before closing your door on the way out, and once again before opening your zipper on the way in.

Early. The early bird gets the worm. If you can do it early then you still have a chance at another round that evening. Of course we mean with the same partner. What were you thinking? Early to bed, early to rise…

Effort. Make the effort. What can you lose? Not much besides a put down, a punch in the mouth, a slap from his or her partner, or a sexually transmitted disease. The list goes on. Think positively. Make the effort. What’s a little put down? Don’t go after someone who is presently attached. Use a condom, guys. Make sure he uses a condom, gals. Make the effort.

Feeling. Show your feelings. And feel what’s showing, and what’s not showing. You don’t have to go around singing Morris Albert’s 1975 pop hit. If you do you will be in good company including Ella Fitzgerald (does Gerald fit Ella?), Frank Sinatra, Elvis Presley, and Sarah Vaughan. I hesitate to suggest that you don’t sing. Do what you do best. Feelings.

Fact. Does anybody here remember Jack Webb as Sgt. Joe Friday of the Los Angeles Police Department in Dragnet saying, “Just the facts ma’am”? What about that old joke, “Did you hear what happened to Helena Rubenstein?” “No” “Max Facked Her (Max Factor.)” Stick to the facts but you are allowed to embellish them once in a while.

And now for some things to avoid.

Endurance. Make it last. But the sex act or acts are not an endurance contest. Don’t go for a personal best against the clock and in all likelihood against your partner’s wishes. Otherwise you may find that he or she can no longer endure you.

Fake. I guess if you stick to the facts you can’t fake it. What about going half way, moaning but not groaning? Or was it groaning but not moaning? That the trouble with faking it, you have to work hard to remember what you said and what you did. And watch yourself in some delicatessens where not only the Mock Turtle Soup is fake.
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